Falling standards

Pakistan Times:
Lahore 03 March 2009: In the worst ever performance by their home grown and trained terrorists, all the visiting Sri Lankan cricket team members left Pakistan shore alive. Govt officials expressed concerns about this as it would tarnish the image of Pakistan as a breeding ground of terrorism and their credibility to produce world class terrorists has taken a beating. Govt asked the PSU (Public Sector Units) terrorists groups to improve the training standards and urged the terrorists to take their training and careers seriously.

Prime Minister later during dinner with the participating terrorists chided them mildly that they cannot waste tax payers/US federal Aid money like this. He was particularly harsh on the terrorist who threw under the bus (carrying cricketers), the grenade which did not detonate. Prime Minister worried that this did not do any good to his plans of changing Pakistan National game from Cricket (which anyway is having its natural death) to Hand Grenade Throwing. He felt that this was the best bet for Pakistan's aspiration for an Olympic Gold Medal. He urged erstwhile Pakistan cricket bowlers – Shoaib Akhtar and others, who are famous for throwing instead of bowling, to take up coaching terrorists on grenade throwing as their cricket careers are finished now…